August 13th, 2004

Alen Vs. Predator

I thought the trailers for AVP looked pretty interesting. Granted, I wouldn't go see the movie expecting a Fellini masterpiece, but it seemed like a good, fun, summer popcorn flick, and I have been known to indulge in some cinematic junk food from time to time.

But we have to be a little wary of AVP. Three things have got me a bit concerned about this one:

First off, there have been no reviews for this movie prior to release. Fox had been telling folks the movie wasn't finished, but I think they were just hiding it in hopes of duping an uninformed audience on opening weekend. Then again, if they really were editing and re-editing this movie right down to the wire, that's still a big red flag.

Second, the movie is only 80 minutes long. This is what happens when the editor tries to salvage a good movie from a piece of crap. They usually don't succeed, but at least you don't suffer for as long.

Third, it's rated PG-13. Both Predator movies and all four Alien movies are rated R. I wanna see the Predator pulling out people's spines and Alien acid melting faces. Do the Alien and Predator settle their differences with a pillow fight in this one? This in particular has studio-cashing-in-on-a-popular-franchise written all over it.

Some reviews are starting to trickle in now that the movie is in theaters, but my personal spidey-sense says, "stay away from this movie!"

In space, no one can hear you ask for a refund.

Don't say you weren't warned.
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