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Jarrett Heather
Jarrett Heather's Journal
jarrett
jarrett
The Adventures of Scratchy
I turned Scratchy into a Leopard. Not a big adjustment, just spots instead of stripes. Last night, we were hanging out on the second island, trying to convert as many villagers as possible, and expanding our realm of influence. But I'm taking my time, trying to teach Scratchy as best I can how to be a kind and generous diety. I'm making good progress, I think. I can leave him on his own and he's finally able to resist the urge to eat any tasty villagers while I'm not looking. He frequently wants to help them out, usually by providing them with miraculous food and wood, and occassionally miraculous water for certain trees that he's become fond of. It's all pretty random, but it keeps the villagers impressed enough to believe in me. His latest habit is healing villagers on a whim. I don't know if it helps any, but I give him extra rubs for being nice to the troops.

We've had our occassional misunderstandings. You see, the little villagers won't breed on their own, you have to tell them to. So a frequent task is to pick up a male, and place him next to a female, thus assigning him as a breeder disciple. It's all simple enough, except I got into a bit of a hurry. I dropped one of the villagers from about 10 feet in the air instead of placing him gently on the ground. Scratchy wasn't in my sight, but I immediately heard a roar, so I knew he was watching me. He stops whatever he was doing, and looks directly at me. The next thing I know, he scoops up a villager and tosses him screaming about 500 yards to his death. I had to slap the bejesus out of Scratchy, which made him angry. Scratchy likes to kick things when he's angry. Especially trees. So before you know it he's knocking over cedars and indirectly trashing houses. The villagers scattered in fear. It was quite a mess.

After we cured the Indian village of food poisoning (long story), they rewarded us with the lightning miracle. Every time I learn a new miracle I have to take the time to teach it to Scratchy. So I attach the leash of learning, and he watches while I cast it a few times. This is our first aggressive miracle, so I led him to the ocean to watch me cast lightning into the water where it wouldn't hurt or scare the villagers. The lightning has a broader range than I was prepared for. After striking a few times in the water, a lick of white lightning stuck Scratchy himself and he immediately burst into flames. He didn't panic. He calmly cast the miraculous water over himself, just as he were watering his favorite tree. I figured that's a good habit for him to learn, so I struck him again, this time directly. He put it out. I was impressed. I did it again. Then again. Then... he died. I cast the healing miracle on him, which seemed to fix him right up. And he didn't seem to mind that he'd been cooked alive by his master. I felt guilty, nonetheless.

A lot of people are sharing stories of raising their creature, none more amusing than Tycho at Penny Arcade. Check it out.
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